Night calls, i love night calls.
The HO and MO i followed were super nice. Then again, i purposely follow those who are nice lar.
Did the usual: clerk cases, set plugs on juicy veins ooh... take bloods... do ECGs....
Met a hainanese ah ma who din want me to take her blood. Searched the ward to find someone who knew what she was saying... couldn't. Decided to go ahead anyway cos the bloods are to check her heart and it's pretty important.
Ah Ma, tam po4 tia hor! i hoped she understood a bit of Hokkien. She started shouting at me... the rest of the ward stirred. Everyone else was asleep liao. I din know what she was saying but it din sound v nice. Guess i dun want to find out. Then she started talking to someone behind me. I looked behind and saw no one... But she's looking at someone... oh man... oh man... not good. Let's get this over and done with...
Ah ma has low threshold for pain like some people i know. Screamed and pulled her hand away. Blood oozed out of the puncture wound i had made.
Ah Ma, mai4 ting tang!
Ah ma scolds me back and tells her invisible friend about me... i dun know what she is saying. I try again... another movement, another push, another hole to plug with that alcohol swab until the bleeding stops. I can't believe this... getting fed up liao...
Ah Ma.... i tried to look fierce to scare her. Used to work on other patients... but not this time. Ah Ma believes she and her friend can make enough noise to drive me away. They are wrong... cos i very stubborn one. And the bloods are for cardiac enzymes. Only thing i scared of is that she will have a heart attack.
After plugging 3 holes, i decide to use brute force and pin Ah Ma's hand down so she can't move it. She started crying... i felt bad... first time i force myself on a gal... shouldn't lar, even when it comes to Ah Mas. I sighed... and got down to taking the blood. Had to sayang her after that.
Apart from that interesting encounter, i also set a plug for a 150kg ship captain who jokingly threathened to pummel me if i dun get it right. He also said he knew it was a bit hard for me cos his skin is dark. And said tt the gal who last tried it went off crying. I jus took it as an exaggeration. Prayed really hard to get it right, and i did... amazing cos i usually cause a big hematoma haha... and this time it's like going in blind also cos can't see can't feel. Then he decided to chit chat with me and i din noe how to say no to a dude whose forearm was bigger than my neck. Listened to his stories abt sailing here and there, and abt his exploits with women from all over the world, tho he qualified that he's gotten married and have settled down already.
It seems that sick male patients love to talk abt their sexual prowess. Had another patient who had 22 children from 7 wives with ard 8 gathered ard him. He went on and on telling me abt the girlfriends he had from this district and that district in the most wonderful country in the world, where i come from. I think 1 is enough... too much headache la...
Last patient i saw had heart failure, bumped a vein ... *again* and saw darkness spreading... like some horror show.
Uncle, you taking warfarin ah?
Yah, i taking...
Oh sheeeeT!... i press the wound site for dunno how long. But it still looked real bad.
Sorry uncle.
Never mind.
And i felt even worse.
