Doing this posting makes me feel like i got a lot of issues man.
For one, i get sian everytime there is a test... the sianness is usually rather sudden in onset, and increases progressively over the course of the nex 1-2 weeks. Sianness is dull in nature, like a toad that's sitting somewhere on top of my head and i am afraid to brush it aside cos i am afraid that toad will turn to elephant dung the moment i touch it. It radiates into every facet of my life and i sometimes dun feel like studying, which is something that i usually enjoy very much. It doesn't affect my sleep, appetite or sex drive (i am still equally frustrated).
Aggravating factors for this sianness include life events like harbouring a growth or 2 in my anatomy, growing a new skin tag (no, it's not a wart and i am a poor candidate to ever get STD for obvious reasons), seeing an innocent young blackhead evolve into a nodular-cystic acne and then feeling the angst as i detonate that fragile structure only to live with a
box-car type of scar some 2 weeks later.
Other aggravating factors include relational conflicts or the lack thereof, with dad... it's complex. Losing my logbook sure didn't help, nor did the hassle of runnig from department to department getting ready a letter to say that i had lost it. And the real drag of getting all the IC numbers and signatures of all the doctors hasn't even started yet.
Relieving factors include praying, reading Bible, and pontanging class to DOTA, and i have a good game.. which is quite hard since bloody HJ is so good at jugg. Other relieving factors include DOTA, DOTA, and DOTA... and DOTA. HA's solution of pcc tds would only temporarily assuage the sianness, n leave me feeling more sian after that. Swimming really helps, and i used to swim everyday, but now cannot... not for a couple more weeks at least. Ms YPL and LH's retail therapy works... but i got no money now cos my retail therapy usually involves me spending a whole lot of money at once buying some gadget... playing with the new toy would help, but that monster is sitting at the HP service centre right now... how not to sian?
I am wondering if i got dysthymia...
1)can't concentrate when studying
2)feel low
3)no energy
Can qualify? And since every posting also sian, and i have been in school for 4 years plus, so >2 years liao...